Friday, May 30, 2003

I Hope this is Photoshopped!

Thursday, May 22, 2003

SLOPS outbreak worldwide

The World Health Organisation today issued a new warning against non-essential travel to the entire Western hemisphere following renewed concerns about the spread of Severe Loss of Perspective Syndrome (SLOPS).

Officials are warning travellers not to visit the UK, the US, almost all of Western Europe, and Canada, following further outbreaks of the disease, which has led to mass panic among the media, thousands of ecstatic children being kept out of school by their credulous and moronic parents, and increased profits for DIY stores as the idiot public rush to bulk-buy face masks and boiler suits.

A WHO spokesman said, “You’d be much better off going to somewhere like Thailand or China, because all you’ve got to worry about there is SARS, and let’s face it, you’re about as likely to die from that as you are to get kicked to death by a gang of zombie nuns.”

The SARS virus has now claimed a staggering 500 lives in only six months, which makes it considerably more deadly than, say, malaria, which only kills around 3000 people every single day. Malaria, however, mainly effects only darkies what speak foreign, whereas SARS has made at least one English person feel a bit iffy for a couple of days, and is therefore considered much more serious.

The spread of SLOPS has now reached pandemic proportions, with many high-level politicians seemingly affected by the disease. The rapid spread of SLOPS has been linked to the end of the war in Iraq and the need for Western leaders to give the public something to worry about. Otherwise, they might start asking uncomfortable questions about domestic issues, and that simply would not do.

Tuesday, May 13, 2003

A musical weekend

Not just the concert:
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Friday, we had a funeral for Sylvester, our old sacristan, the guy who had been on the job when I first started at St. C's. The new DM couldn't do it. It meant postponing the DC trip 'til 2pm, but it was the least I could do. We pulled the choir together. Songlist was chosen by a former cantor, who brought him the Eucharist after he was too ill to come to church anymore. She led the psalm and the commendation. A family member sang the Ave - very nice. She and I had both wanted the Gounod, but the family insisted on the Schubert.

Prelude: Eye Has Not Seen (Haugen)
............. The King of Love My Shepherd Is (PRESENCE)
............. Ps. 122, The Martyrs' Theme (Lawton)
Procession: Sing With All the Saints in Glory (ODE TO JOY)
Psalm: Ps. 23, Shepherd Me, O God (Haugen)
Gospel Acc: "Come to Me" Alleluia (Joncas)
Presentation: How Great Thou Art (O STORE GUD)
Sanctus / Amen: Mass of Creation (Haugen)
Memorial Acc B: Mass of Light (Haas)
Agnus Dei: Sing Praise and Thanksgiving (Joncas)
Communion: Song of the Body of Christ (NO KE ANO AHI AHI, Haas)
.................. Ave Maria (Schubert)
Commendation: May the Angels (Sands)
Recessional: On Eagle's Wings (Joncas)

Sylvester was 98 when he passed. Our oldest parishioner. Sorry to see him go.
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Kim drove all the way to DC. we finally rolled in about 2am - lots of construction. She likes to drive in silence, especially when she's only got my CDs to choose from. Given her choice, she finally settled on some Allman Bros., and The Band's Greatest Hits. Her comment on St. Duane and the boys: "Wow, these are some really long songs!"
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First concert, at the Shrine, went pretty well. We got lost in NE on the way there when one of the ramps on our route was closed. Drove around lost for a while, finally stopped for directions at a Days Inn - a hooker was checking in at the next window. Her "manager" was waiting outside. There are some things I really don't miss about DC.
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The Shrine itself was lovely, but Kim didn't want to stay for mass, so we drove back to the hotel, and called around to local churches for mass times. Decided to go to Our Lady Queen of Peace in Arlington, because of the 6pm mass time.

VERY interesting mass. Pastor was a Holy Ghost Father, an order I'm unfamiliar with. "Lead Me Guide Me" was in the pews, some compelling gospel-style piano and vocal from a contralto in sweats, and some, but not lotsa, participation from the pews. Deacon's homily blasted their bishop for failing to allow girls as altar servers (even as THEY had a girl serving), the sign of peace ran for 10 minutes as everyone shook everyone's hand, prayers of the faithful included a polling of the assembly, and a number of homegrown acclamations (the Lamb of God was particularly nice). They stopped short of an altar call, and they DID observe their bishop's ban on the cup. But definitely a rebel enclave...
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Dinner at our favorite restaurant in the universe: Mike's American Grill in Springfield, VA. Excellent as always. Saw "About Schmidt" on PPV. Really hit home. Decidedly different role for Jack, but he handled it perfectly. Kathy Bates and Howard Hesseman were excellent too, though maybe we saw a bit too much of Kathy. Knowwhuddimean?
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We had a last minute rehearsal Sunday morning - mostly designed to get our noses out of the scores so we had more communication from our director. VERY productive. Glad we did it.
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Met with friends from our former life in DC ('87-'93) for brunch. Great to see them. Young couple with a 7-month-old daughter. Kim and Jess were supposed to go out for the Christening, Jess got sick at the last minute. Glad Kim got SOMETHING out of the weekend.
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Concert at the Cathedral went VERY VERY well. Every moment of it was better than any moment at any of the other concerts. Still plenty of room for improvement, but we have never sounded so musical. The Cathedral folks taped it for us - hope I get a copy. A couple of internet pals showed up. That was nice, too. Concert was followed by Evensong with the Cathedral's Men's Choir (gorgeous, but we were behind altar and mics were off, so we didn't hear readings or homily), and then by our prof's organ concert on the Cathedral's monster Skinner, ca. 1939. High points were Mendelssohn and Franck, but all was glorious.
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Kim was ticked that we stayed for the concert, but I wouldn't have missed it. Made for an icy first couple of hours going home, though. We picked up some of our regional food favorites: crab chips, birch beer, cranberry nut bread. Yum. Listened to more Band, plus the Dylan/Band Basement Tapes, and a Keith Richards listening list titled "The Devil's Music", a blend of blues, old r&b, reggae, and cajun stuff, from the 30s through the 70s. Sweet.

Somehow, managed to disconnect the radio antenna. My bad. Rolled home about 4am. Spent Monday recovering. All in all, a great weekend!
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Thursday, May 08, 2003

It was so much fun, let's do it again...

Off to DC... my college choir, the Madonna U. Chorale, will be performing at the National Shrine of the Immaculate Conception (by Catholic U.) Saturday 5/10 at 2:45 pm, and at the Episcopal National Cathedral Sunday 5/11 at 3:15 pm. Admission for each concert is free. Sunday's concert will be followed by an Evening Prayer service, and then an organ concert by Dr. David Wagner, our director.

Here's the choir's songlist:

Kyrie, Missa Aeterna Mundi - Palestrina
Gloria, Missa Aeterna Mundi - Palestrina
Song for Athene - Tavener
Ave Maria - Biebl
Miserere - Allegri
Alleluia - Thompson
Laudate Dominum - Goemanne

The program's about 35 minutes. If you make it, be sure to say hi - I'm the tall guy with the mustache and ponytail.

Wednesday, May 07, 2003

Dave Letterman's Cubicleville Top 10

10. Being told to "think outside the box" when you're in a @#$%?* box all day long.
9. Not being able to check e-mail attachments without turning around to see who's behind you.
8. Cubicle walls do not offer much protection from any kind of gun fire.
7. That nagging feeling that if you press the right button, you'll get a piece of cheese.
6. Lack of roof rafters for the noose.
5. The walls are too close together for the hammock to work right.
4. 23 power cords - 1 outlet.
3. Prison cells are not only bigger, they also have beds.
2. The carpet has been there since 1976 and shows more signs of life than your coworkers.

And...the number 1 drawback to working in a cubicle....

1.You can't slam the door and walk out when you quit

Tuesday, May 06, 2003

Report Card

Deja vu all over again...

Music History - A
Chorale - A
Organ - B+

Spring / Summer is gonna be a homegrown theory review with emphasis on ear training (2 credits) and organ (2 credits). Prof promises we'll get to service playing this time. And no more Wachet Auf. YAYYY!!!!!

Friday, May 02, 2003

In Atlanta? Don't miss Saturday's Rich Mullins Tribute concert. Bill's archives appear broken, so scroll down to the 4/22 entry...

Tell Bill, Ken, & Elyn I said hi. Wish I could go...